Wedding Ideas That Make Planning Fun

Now that spring is already here, all I can think about is how fast time goes. It seems like just yesterday I was totally in love with this beautiful girl. All I could think about was my next moment together with her, the next things we would say, the next things we would do.

After a couple of years of that, all I could think of was the next thing…asking her to marry me. Then all I could think about was the next thing…getting married. After we got married, all I could think about was the next thing…getting a house and having kids. Then all I could think about was the next…

Now we have three kids and a house and all the responsibilities that go along with it. In a quieter moment, you might hear me say that I'm worried that the next ten years will go just as fast as the last ten or worse yet…even faster. The first five years of my first son's life have gone so fast that I find myself wondering if I enjoyed them enough, did enough for him, and all those other things that bother people in moments of reflection.

So what does one man's semi-mid-life crisis have to do with weddings? A lot, it turns out. Looking back to where this all started, I would have to say it started somewhere around then - around the time that we decided to get married. Suddenly, there were deadlines, event dates, family needs, and expectations. Adding kids to the mix made it that much more involved.

It's not that there's anything anyone can do about the passage of time. It is what it is. If you stay active and involved it goes fast. If you don't do much with it, it seems to pass rather slowly. And though you can't stop or slow time, there is one thing you can do that will make time, your wedding planning, and your life together afterwards that much better. The one thing you can do with time to make it that much better is…

forget what you want from time. If you forget about whatever it is that you want from time personally, you'll be free to devote your time to those around you. You'll be happier while you plan your wedding because you won't mind as much when the inevitable little problems arise - there's no use wasting time being upset about things you can't fix or prevent. You'll be happier with the people around you because you'll be more interested in what they need during this little slice of time than what you need. People will be happier around you because they'll know you're not going to waste time complaining about the bad time you're having.

One way or another, this time that is your wedding planning, wedding day, and marriage is going to go by - fast. Don't waste a moment of this great time worrying about things that don't matter. Decorations, color schemes, wedding cakes, and favors will be forgotten. Your attitude, kindness, love for others, and humility or lack thereof will be the thing that is remembered by you and everyone else after this time so quickly passes by.

March 17, 2007 - How to Know If You're Overdoing it at Your Wedding Events

Weddings, in a way, are somewhat self indulgent affairs. Couples are sometimes concerned that they don't want to appear overly indulgent, self serving, etc. This is a valid thought and the sign of a decent human. Often, brides will use a logo, monogram, or some other design across several items in their ceremony, reception, decorations, and so on.

And sometimes, they're concerned about not overdoing it. Don't worry about that so much because, in reality, the problem of appearing indulgent has a completely different cause.

Personalization of items, monograms and so on has practically nothing to do with the concept of appearing indulgent. The problem is much simpler than that. Allow us to explain...

The reason you might be afraid of appearing indulgent is that you're sort of throwing a party for yourself. But, are you really doing that? You are paying for the reception, and it only exists because of you, but you're not really throwing a party for yourself if you look at it from the right angle. This is an important element and is where quite a few go the wrong way.

Appearing indulgent has nothing to do with things but everything to do with the way you plan and conduct your wedding events.

Start with your mindset.

• You're on the right track if you're throwing a party/reception for your family and friends to thank them for being there with you, for supporting you, for giving gifts, for giving time, and for spending money to be there.

• You're on the wrong track if you're throwing a party/reception to celebrate yourselves as a couple and display who you are, what you have, and so on.

How do you objectively know what your mindset is? The symptoms of being on the right track include:

• Not sweating the small stuff because the important part is getting everyone together.

• Staying within your budget instead of overextending to make an impression.

• Thinking about helping everyone have a good time instead of worrying excessively about having perfect decorations, food, etc.

• Considering your guests when choosing event locations (ease of travel, weather, proximity of affordable accommodations, needs of elderly guests, etc.)

• Offering enough variety of food that all can enjoy something. Believe it or not, many couples offer dishes that represent something unusual that makes a statement about them, rather than offering food most guests would enjoy, and a smaller sampling of the unusual items.

• Thinking of ways guests can participate at the reception.

The symptoms of being on the wrong track include:

• Getting angry with those that are helping you plan the big day because things aren't going perfectly.

• Being angry with those financially supporting you because they won't spend enough.

• Going way over budget to make the right impression.

• Being harsh with vendors/planners/service people. Note: if you find yourself excusing yourself because you "want things to be perfect," or because this is "my big day that only happens once," you're already on the wrong track and well on the way to being miserable on this supposedly wonderful day, no matter how well it goes.

• Ostentatious displays of pictures of you doing fabulous things with fabulous people and having extravagant things.

• Using charitable giving in a way that focuses on your generosity instead of encouraging giving. Be especially careful with this - it's very easy to make the wrong impression. Hint: Put the focus on the guests' opportunity to make a contribution, not what you have done or may do for the charity.

All of us lapse at times into some of the "wrong track" items, so it's normal to feel like you may have faltered in some way. This is a good sign that your conscience is working and a good sign that you'll correct that line of thinking in plenty of time to keep it from getting out of hand.

In short, this is really a long way of saying that, if you keep the right attitude, you won't go wrong. That attitude is simply that the reception is a time for your guests to have a great time with or without you - remember, you'll be very busy with much less time to visit than you might think. It's a way to say thanks for coming, helping, and supporting you on this great day.

So don't worry too much about decorations, personalization, and those sorts of little things. Think about the guests' good time and the rest will take care of itself.

March 29, 2007 - Decorating for Destination Weddings

The weather is great in a lot of places and destination weddings are in full swing. A lot of people wonder about how to decorate for their big day somewhere far away. It seems difficult at first because you may have never seen the exact place where you'll be married until you get there, so here are a few tips for getting the job done.

Let the setting do its job. If you're getting married on or beside a beach, water, mountain, and so on, you have a good setting already so you don't need to create it with excessive decoration.

Decorations normally help set the mood. Everyone at your destination wedding probably feels like they're on a sort of vacation. They're probably in a pretty good mood just because they're away from home. Since your setting is already setting the mood for you, there's no need to do that much if you don't want to.

Use decorations at your destination wedding to mark your territory. Depending on the place that you use, you may need to mark off a special area to keep random people from wandering in and out of your event. Even if that's not a factor, placing decorations in the right spots can help your own guests know where to congregate for the different parts of your ceremony and/or reception.

Pick decorations that are right for the job. In other words, make sure your decorations can last in your destination wedding environment. Will your flowers look good in the heat of the sun and on into the evening? Is it windy? Will your decorations stay in place? Will your food and wedding cake hold up to the elements?

No matter what you do - relax and enjoy. Decorations are less important at a destination wedding. Whether you have a lot of them or not, people will be having a great time. And you'll be so happy about what's really going on, that you won't be thinking about them at all.